The Imperious and the Obsequious

Ben has a wonderful new teacher this year, who believes that students should actually be challenged.  This week’s spelling words were based on the book that his class is reading in class this month, The Secret Garden.  Since it’s a nineteenth century novel, it has some arcane words (like arcane, I suppose).  I doubt that any of these words are on Georgia’s CRCT exam, and that’s just fine with me – I’ll refrain from jumping up on my soapbox and offering my opinions on standardized tests.  At any rate, Ben came home this week with his list of 10 spelling and vocabulary words.  I was impressed.

Ben is enjoying his new spelling and vocabulary words.  He especially enjoys using them when he talks to his sister.  He has found that his new big words come in handy when he wants to insult her.

“Libby,” he told her in the car today, “I think that you are quite imperious. You’re also surly.  And you’re definitely not obsequious.  Oh yeah, and you’re also massively stout.”

Libby protested.  “I know he’s insulting me, but I don’t know what he’s saying!” 

I played along and refused to translate for her.

Libby decided to exact revenge.  We had been rocking out to “Semi-Charmed Life” by Third Eye Blind when she got a hold of the iPod.  After searching through the music library for a few minutes, she cranked up the volume and turned on… Justin Bieber.

Ben and I howled in protest.  “NO!!”

“Not fair!”  I yelled over the radio.  “You can’t do this to me! I’m collateral damage!”

Then it got worse.  She started to sing along.

Baby, baby, baby, ooh

Like baby, baby, baby ooh

Like….

We howled even louder.

Ben surrendered.  “All right! I take it back!  You are un-massively stout!  You are un-imperious!  I mean it!”

But she wouldn’t turn it off. 

As I write this, she is posting on Facebook, telling all her friends how she got Mama and Ben in the car this afternoon. 

 But I’ll show her imperious little butt. 

I’m putting on Lady GaGa when she gets in the car next time.  And I’m gonna sing along:

P-p-p-poker face, p-p-poker face

(Mum mum mum mah)

P-p-p-poker face, p-p-poker face

(Mum mum mum mah)